The above title carries a meaning =)

 

 

Among so many school camps that I have attended since the beginning of this year, I daresay I enjoyed this one the most.

 

It's just...so different. The experience, the events, and most importantly, the people.

 

No gooey flour-water mixture, no water-bombing, no JJ mass dance (this was kind of a pity?), no many things. But in the end, spirits were high, teamwork has never been so strong among family members, and most importantly, everyone enjoyed themselves greatly. All at the same time while experiencing the hardships of being a leader. I bow to thee, Planning Committee. Nowhere else can you find a bunch of people that have the ability to merge so many contrasting things into one fun package. Mr. Simon Leow and Mr. "Handsome" Ng, you two remain the legendary duo that can make people cry and laugh at the same time. To all LG08 and F2, thanks for being such a indescribable bunch of great people. As a personal word of thanks, Angeline, Hui Xin and JB, thanks for keeping me company through the camp. You all rock, man.

 

或许这就是领导者与非领导者之间的区别吧。到最后，我也必须承认，我的生命是不平凡的，我的人生也将不会永远被埋藏于堆积如山的宝石中，因为，我也是宝石堆中的一颗"黑"珍珠，或许我不比其他人更出色，但我始终是颗珍珠，始终是颗会发出柔光的珍珠。总有一天，我有属于我的天……

 

Lastly, a song. Dedicated to all campers. No matter whether I have known you or not throughout the course of this camp, thanks for making the camp a success and a memorable experience. Together, we achieve and we excel, as we venture on the road of life unwinding before us... =)

 

 

Strangers before

A world apart

We barely noticed one another

Till angels in this heavenly place

Brought us together through joy and laughter...

 

I hold you close

I hold you near

We may not be forever

But when I have to let you go

My heart it hurts me so

 

You turned around

You walked away

And tears flowed down my cheeks

As moments turn into memories

In memories we'll relive

 

My life for these 4+ years have been a dream.

 

The Beginning - when I longed to break free.

The Destruction - when many things happened that brought my life into a state of turmoil.

The Resurrection - when I found hope, once more, in myself and those around me.

The Parting - when we split up to pursue our future destiny.

The End - when the link to the past is finally broken.

 

Actually I don't even know whether The End will be The End, once and for all. Dreams are dreams...what will happen next? We don't know. After all, links are hard to break, and I am a nostalgic person.

 

Life is a dream...

 

Erm...and I suddenly realised this is a good start for me to write a novel. I desperately need to find some hope for my English after failing my GP. Let's see whether I have time.

This space is now open for public viewing. It's not updated often, but i will try to add stuff while I can.

 

One word of warning though: If you have requested to view this space and yet cannot access this place, do not continue reading. I ban you for a reason. I don't want to make my life harder.

 

Erm, and, yeah, if you see entries written in a language you don't understand...feel free to request for translations at the comments area.

 

And if my blog causes your computer to lag...well...I'll see what I can do. Or else...time to change to a new one =P

 

Enjoy. And be warned.

[originally written on May 21, but apparently I didn't publish it. sigh. *bangs head on wall*]

 

first word. TIRING...

 

The Cluster West 6 Facilitators Camp was tiring enough. And I had to attend it with a sore throat...imagine my poor throat suffering under stress due to cheering...haha.

 

And more cheering later tonight at Mediacorp where we go and support our school in some show called "It's Showtime"...I'm still feeling quite excited about this though...it's the first time I got a chance to go to Mediacorp in 4 years...so sorry there, moi throat...

 

second word...happy?

 

Oh well, it's more of a sense of shock and disbelief and tasting the sweetness of victory rather than a great sense of achievement... Team 2 of 06L03 won 2nd place in the inter-class Chinese Riddle Competition held on Wednesday the 17th of May at LT5... I was part of the team, so...yeah. A 10 dollar Popular voucher is also a neat prize...hahaha. If only it was valid until 07.07.07...

 

haha those of you who know the significance of this date...well done.

 

The biggest shock was that i won the best individual award (literally "Golden Arrow Award", another spin-off of the famous "Golden X Awards" in the film industry where you replace X with "globe", "horse"...etc.) for the competition! However, I couldn't really sense the logic behind how they selected the best individual...

 

My reasoning during the competition was such: At the final round and after the tiebreakers, Team 2 of 06L03 and Team 06S were tied on points...(both got 90 by then if i'm not wrong). Then suddenly the host asked member A (as in 3 members in a team - member A, B and C) from both teams to participate in a one-on-one fastest-finger-first battle.

 

Now, my question is: if both member Bs or member Cs went on instead then what would the outcome be? It could be different altogether...but they didn't do so. Anyway, I shall not complain about this...there's nothing to complain about now that I've won it. It's just that this question suddenly came up in my mind...

 

 

Oh well, I shalt not think too much.

 

Lastly, a little quiz result of mine:

 

 

Yeah. The title speaks for itself.

 

Project Work (ARRRRGGGHHH), countless assignments, tests which you just can't seem to pass, long school timetables, and in my case, almost-entirely-sucky CCA environment, which thus disables the function of having CCAs to enjoy yourself and also develop other "talents" thet you may have...

 

Can't stand it...Really...

 

Everyday go to school, fight with the Sleep Demon to stay awake in class, going around slacking when you're NOT SUPPOSED TO (but you just can't help it)...

 

ARRRRGGGHH...

 

If this continues to go on for the rest of my JC life I'll not be able to survive any longer...

 

Yeah. Deadly. And I'm not exaggerating this.

 

I just hope I do not (somehow) incur my teachers' displeasure and get the Death Sentence again...

 

I hope...

Time for a commercial break!

 

It's the time of JJ's termly Test-O-Rama!

 

See Who Survives?

 

Pit yourselves against immensely hard test papers! Frown and stare at the "cheem" bunch of words floating on that rectangular sheet of blankness in front of you! Crack your brain for tens of minutes without any idea on what to write down on that piece of lined paper!

 

It's the ULTIMATE CHALLENGE! Wooh! It's FUN! It's COOL! And best of all...It's FREE!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

.............

 

 

 

 

 

 

i know that by now you all are having this kind of face ---->  -____________________-'"

 

 

Ok, for sure, I will not be the one who survives this time.

 

Known that I've failed my C.Lit, most probably my Chem (Mole Concept, my worst) and definitely Maths (Functions and Partial Fractions)...sigh. That means all the tests that I've taken to date.

 

oh wait...forgot GP. As much as people keep on stressing that I'm an English O Level A1, GP is SOOO different from O level comprehension. It just feels more E. Lit than normal O Level-ish English. (According to my Sec1-2 results, I absolutely suck in E. Lit.) And therefore, I do not expect myself to excel in my first test for General Paper.

 

Although I am definitely sure that it will turn out much better than the others. (If it doesn't...may the heavens bless me.)

 

whatever...it's the first test. But I know if some people ever get to read this post, I'll have a hard time during the holidays, and most likely, the future...you know, nag nag nag, harsh comments ("stupid", "you can just come back here to study"..etc etc), tution tution tution...

 

Luckily I am 99% sure that they will never be able to access this site. (well..things aren't absolute in this world...I try not to hope for the worst.)

 

Anyway...that's enough talking about tests. I shall not make my readers go all paranoid about tests...you know, Test-O-Ramas are generally experienced by all JC students...

 

Semoga Berjaya to all. <----this means "All the Best" in Malay..for those who do not understand.

looooong time no updates.

 

Anyway, today we 06L03-ians hosted the very first of Campus Supertalk (绝对 Supertalk) in school. Don't be mistaken...it's just a platform for us to talk. Some would rather call it Campus Supercrap. (绝对 Supercrap...??)

 

Ahaha.

 

On the whole, it was just O.K., lah. Our debate wasn't really good, the Chinese crosstalk weren't really good (although it still managed to make the audience laugh)...but on the whole it was just O.K.. Well...we're first-timers in this...can't really blame us, right?

 

Anyway, Google Corp. has a new chinese name - 谷歌. Hmm...considering that now it's the lunar season of Gu Yu (节气: 谷雨) They've done a flash animation..and I found it pretty interesting...Chinese Literature-ish (in other words, cheem and 'beautiful') words and Chinese ink paintings and all that...hmm. Watch for yourselves...

 

So. The hols are (long) over, and many things change.

 

I have been put into a new class. 06L03...and this time, with the presence of guys. Haha. So far quite enjoyable...and some people are not as AP as they seem. Makes me regret writing that...( I won't tell what)

 

---

 

Just occurred to me that everything around me is changing.

 

The environment, the people, their attitudes, friendships...

 

It is very disturbing to see friendship bonds, bonds that were once so strong that no one could break them, fall apart and slowly disintegrate....and finally vanish into thin air, leaving no trace of its presence except the deep gashes left in the hearts of those who were victims of this cruel happening...

 

Very sad indeed. I know how it feels to be lonely, where those whom you once cared for so much left you without any warning, denied the care you once showered upon them, leaving you alone, to be consumed by eternal darkness...

 

Or perhaps I am too pessimistic to say so...

 

People say that even in the darkest of nights, there are still glimmering lights of hope shining upon you...giving you the strength to continue on your long journey...

 

People, do care about others' feelings too. Everyone wants to be loved. Every friend we make is like a light of hope, lighting the path ahead of us, ensuring that we are not lost whilst journeying on the road of life...Don't push them aside just like that...because it really hurts.

 

A lot.

...and I really do mean it, because you'll be laughing so hard that you'll be throwing up your meal.

 

 

 

 *note: the posting of this picture is purely for fun. no offence meant...if you find it offensive please inform me and I'll take it down.

 

Pictures taken from The Star's Mind Your English: Boob Watch section sometime during the March holidays.

sigh. again.

 

Really don't know what's wrong with me nowadays...firstly I feel "demonized", the next moment I tell my parents that I actually wanted  to go back to Malaysia for this March holidays.

 

And so, ta-da, here I am, back in Malaysia, being, once more, the temporary, no-pay Maria of the house.

 

Oh my, I SO do regret my decision. I'd rather be enjoying myself with 3/4E 2005 at East Coast Park (people did I get this right?) rather than being ordered about the house doing household chores, or being scolded at for something extremely insignificant.

 

I was tired of this kind of life 4 years and 3 months ago. That's why I chose to break free.

 

And now here am I, back to the past.

 

Sigh.

 

How I wished I was back.

 

 

Damn it. What's wrong with me these days.

 

Crying without any reason, feeling very 郁闷 most of the time, not handing up homework AGAIN, speaking to myself...

 

Am I starting to have schizophrenic characteristics now...??

 

Or do I just think too much, yet again...

 

Sigh. What has my life come to? I seem to be changing for the worse when some others think that I am changing for the better.

 

Oh heavens, end this intense psychological torment...It burns me, bit by bit, day by day...till I cease to exist, and only my shallow skeleton remain in this world.

 

..........this is indescribable.

 

 

Sigh.

 

俗语说：“天下无不散之宴席。”

 

不过，这场宴席也散得太早了吧……

 

棋局已定，战役将始……

 

蜜月期结束……

 

---

 

The 18 clans are gathering themselves, preparing for the final battle at the GreAt Plains of Noitanimaxe after 1 year and 9 months...

 

Drums pound, warhorns blare, shrill warcries in the distance...

 

Thumping feet of thousands of marching men that make the ground beneath tremble...

 

Crows cawing in the sky, vultures scavenging the corpses of the long dead, leftovers of those who perished...

 

As the clouds of doom draw near...the sky darkens...the winds howl, then drop into deadly silence, a fleeting hint of what's going to come...

 

Be prepared...

 

 

呃……我那用了逾五年的手机又在跟我作对了……而且是一天比一天坏……

 

讲电话讲不到一半，电池就挂了……看似如此，却又能马上开启手机……（够AP了吧）

!@#%&@ 的手机，就是不要让我讲电话……

喂，我是你的主人耶，你干吗这样对待我？

我又没有虐待过你……你凭什么那么AP……???

我们人类有句话说：

 

“老了……

不中用了……”

 

看来你真的该寿终正寝了……

但是却还有三个月的手机合约缠着我……

啊啊啊啊啊……

I just can't wait....!!!!

（纵然我不想要时间那么快地流失）

finally. it's all over.

 

I can't say I'm not satisfied with what I have...having L1R5 = single digit is totally a miracle for me...

 

The feeling you get when you finally pass a subject which you have failed for 4 years is even more jubilating...

 

An improvement from L1R5 30+ during Sec 3 mid year to L1R5 >10 in the real O level exam is nonetheless great...

 

Victory is sweet...even though what you get is not what you dream of...

 

Yes...I no longer walk alone...I am no longer myself.

 

I am me. Of the past.

 

I awaken.

 

[details coming up tomorrow...I am too tired.]

哇。

 

今早一醒来就觉得浑身不舒服，眼睛痛，自己感觉上好像被丢进火炉一般，全身发热……后来用体温计量了体温，恍然发觉我的体温居然高达39.4摄氏度……前所未有啊。

 

今天又不知道怎么搞的，吃antibiotics时居然不能把药丸咽下去，还把其中一颗药丸吐了出来。

 

haiz...dunno what's wrong with me...

 

must go to school tomorrow...last OG meeting leh...

 

but must sleep now...too tired...

首先要先祝各位农历新年快乐！Happy Chinese New Year to all of you!

 

我刚从马来西亚回来，身体状况也不太好，看来是吃了太多吧……（虽然自己不这么认为啦）

 

从年初二早上开始，身子就一直很虚弱，今天更是糟糕，今早一睡醒就感觉到喉咙痛，身体发热，似乎连睁开眼睛和走路的力气都没有了。在从马六甲到新加坡的路程上，我一直都在呼呼大睡，醒来了还想睡。不愧是死猪一只……哈哈。其实也怪不得我啦，我是生病的人嘛……但是，在农历新年期间生病是要付出很惨重的代价的，as I found out after I went to consult a doctor for my sickness. The price: $80 (in Singapore dollars, which equals to over RM 160). OMG. Just for such a minor sickness like fever + heatiness（发热气）. Guess that I am really blessed by the gods. *sigh*

 

Anyway, my sickness aside, this year's Chinese New Year has been more boring and tiring compared to previous years. Everyday I wake up still feeling tired, and come back feeling even more tired. Guess this is how I got sick. And during such a nice time of the year. Sad for me. Visits have not been interesting too. This year I didn't go to the aquarium run by my distant relative (which is the biggest in Malaysia, and has at least 3 dogs and other exotic fish), nor go visit other relatives with my cousins. It's just me, my sister (which, by the way, is also down with the same sickness as me) and my parents. How boring indeed. And for once, the amount of food I consume during each visit doesn't really help to alleviate my boredom. There is INDEED something wrong with me.

 

I think I'll stop here for now...have to go and take a rest, and maybe legitimately take one day off tomorrow...haha.

[don't ask me why am I updating this blog at 3am. I'm just very crazy. And many do agree with that.]

 

so well...long time no update...

 

My life in JJ has been, well, so far, so good...homework has yet to become a huge burden; PE lessons are surprisingly slacker that what I expected them to be...but i suppose this is just the beginning...the monster has yet to awaken from its 2-month slumber... Anyway, for the first time,I have become a Language Rep. Chinese Representative, to be exact. One of my stronger subjects, eh? Well, again, people who know me well will definitely question the suitability of me taking up such a post...for obvious and not-so-obvious reasons. =P But I will try to change... Life as an LEP student is getting more busy now...with the formation of the committees...I really do hope that everyone can work together well. Seriously.

 

---

 

Something's still troubling me though. Greatly. I am still facing a huge dilemma in choosing my CCA.

 

I went for CLDDS on Wednesday and found it not bad...at least I can re-take up chinese calligraphy there... From what I know and what I have experienced, JJ CLDDS is indeed not bad. The people there are quite enthusiastic about their CCA (i.e. passionate!), and they're quite an united bunch. No one walks alone.(Plus, the President is Tianlu, originally from RVCO.  O___O)  But the newcomers, as I observe, are at least 80% Fuhua Sec people. Will I get left out? Worse still, I really really really don't know how to start an *interesting* conversation with others, so I can't really talk with them for very long, and in the process, know them better...

 

Then comes JJ Choir. From what I have heard, the people in JJ Choir have not much passion to sing. And I really don't like the sound of this because if you don't have the passion to sing, you can't really sing well. And so, I may just not like the environment there (because no one is passionate about singing. as a choir. as one.), and I may just be unable to enjoy singing, because everyone is simply not co-operating and working with and supporting each other to produce the best music that they, as a whole group, can make. Yes, only those who have experienced life in choir will realise that being a chorister is no slacking matter. However, I have really liked making music and singing as a whole. I really do miss my choir days, looking at SATB scores, having combined practice, listening to the harmonization, trying to hit that high (or low) note during warmups...really makes me marvel at how wonderful the human voice can be. Plus, I think the choir is trying to boost their morale by recruiting those who can sing well. During this year's auditions they had a really detailed assessment rubric for each of the students who went to audition, and from that I can see their effort. Should I go and be part of the team?

 

[really, really, really confused.]

 

---

 

anyway...yesterday i went to sentosa with OG5 and the rest of Family 1. OG5 sure rocks man, we were the most "complete" OG (out of all 5 in F1)...mwahahaha. Initially it was really fun, with the whole F1 playing captains ball (OGLs vs. J1s! We won...mwahahaha) on the beach and later, an attempt at "captain's frisbee" that surely laughed the hell out of everyone =P...no one could catch the stupid flying thing...it goes wherever you DON'T WANT it to go. >___< But then after having lunch at 7-11, I felt quite sian diao...tried to play volleyball but just couldn't hit the ball hard enough...really made myself look like a complete fool in front of my OG mates lor...so in the end I gave up playing...and sat beneath the shelters on the beach with Meichen and Sha2, looking towards the sea, and at the same time keeping a lookout for any suspicious movements by other family members that may possibly end us up in the sea... >___<

 

Oh yes, and we tried to do the mass dances we did during JJ Night on the beach. But our OG members were mostly not taking part in the dance session: we were either playing volleyball, resting in the shaded area, simply forgot the steps, couldn't find a dance partner, or that we just didn't want to partner someone of the opposite sex for the dance. And I fit snugly to the last 3 categories. Though I think, this time, less of the last one. Bleh.

 

Sentosa has changed a lot since the last time I went there last yr...they revamped the siloso beach area, and I guess that really appealed to me...they improved the beach tram service, built huge sheltered areas (pavilions, as they call it) near the beach...etc. Guess I won't be tired of going to Sentosa for quite some time =)

 

Anyway, I realise what I've written above is getting really too dotty...[see, the dots again. I have contracted the "Dot Syndrome", have I not?]

 

[Forgive me for my crappiness this time..as I told you, I'm crazy. Especially so when you see me blogging at..whoa, 4am.]

 

[advice? comments?]

哈哈……我被分进06L02了……one of the 3 LEP classes in JJC...

 

说起我这一班还真是很特别呢……

 

我们班最特别的两处是：

 

一、班上只有十二个人。所以每次assembly时J1班级队伍中最短的其中一列便属于我们班的了。不过班上既然只有这么少人，以后应该也会比其它班级要团结得多吧！^^ （可悲的是，我仍然未能记住班上所有同学的名字……我真失败啊……）

二、班上十二个人全是女生！这简直出乎我意料之外……或许是因为从小学到现在都没有见识过如此的一种局面…… by the way 这恐怕不止阴盛阳衰了……我也不知道要怎么叙述。Girl Power是也……哈哈……

 

至目前为止我与班上同学相处甚好……但愿以我不会在JJ重蹈覆辙……不回到我在RV中一中二时过的痛苦生活……那种痛楚已在我心上割出了一道无法治疗的疤痕，我不希望让自己再痛苦多一次……

 

至此为止……

 

~looking forward to a new life, a whole new world...a world where I can shine in~